The art of taking things slow
Life is hectic. A new day, more like a new problem, and with every new problem it almost feels like we can’t keep track of the things that matter to us. I often find myself in a constant rush and I barely ever find myself doing things slowly. Everything has a deadline that I am stressing to meet. Going to work on time, cleaning my home, getting groceries. All these responsibilities resting on my head, yet so little time to do them all. That’s when I find myself rushing every little thing, it’s no longer about doing things right and instead it becomes more about can I finish this quickly so that I can finally relax.
But as I get older I find the list of responsibilities getting longer and longer. The more stuff added, the more I become stressed out. With stress and pressure I had begun to notice things were less and less put together in my life. No longer was my bed nicely made or all my laundry done. While those sound small and many of us overlook them, we become blind on how those small things add up. It became this pattern of rushing to do things, then being more stressed when that rushed feeling causes a lack of quality in what I did.
In today’s world we simply don’t have time for everything despite are efforts. So how exactly can we afford to take things slower when we barely have the time to relax? While it’s not always easy, it can be achieved, and through my own experiences I hope to share with you guys my journey on taking things slow.
The Build Up
The build up to me wanting to make a change was simple. I had no time for anything! In fact my life was becoming like a daily calendar. Everything felt like it needed to be planned or else it just wouldn’t fit into my tightly packed schedule. I have to wake up early to go to work, then get home, clean, cook, do laundry, work out, plan a hangout with friends, figure out my bills, and on and on and I could go on forever with everything I try to fit into my day.
But where in that schedule was the time reserved for me. Not for planning, not for doing chores, not for work, but for me? Well there wasn’t and it really began taking it’s toll on me. Soon I became drained from being busy. But when I wasn’t I felt like I was wasting time. Why am I sitting around when I could be doing this or doing that? Even if I had caught up with everything I was still stuck with the fear that I wasn’t, and that by not keeping busy I would just be adding more to do for the next day.
It even led me to hanging out with my friends less, not just because I was busy, but now I had so little time to myself that as cruel as it sounds I just didn’t want to waste it on them. Not cause I hate them, I just felt so tired, so drained, and desperately craved the chance to do something I wanted.
But even when I finally got those precious moments to myself it felt hard to enjoy it. My room felt hectic from the morning, bed barely made, laundry piling up, dishes that needed to be washed. If my room wasn’t decently clean it felt hard to relax but putting things off till the next made that following day harder. So how exactly have I fixed these plethora of problems?
There’s Always Tomorrow
The biggest thing I have had to come to terms with is that there is always tomorrow. Now, I know for the longest time we have been taught quite the opposite. Tomorrow is never certain and while sure that may be true, for the majority of us tomorrow does indeed come. Even if it didn’t, I think I can speak for most of us when I say I doubt you would want to spend your last day on earth stressed the fuck out.
With that being said it’s easier said than done. Even as I write this I still struggle with managing my time and stress but my mindset on how I deal with both has changed a lot. I still have bosses breathing down my neck about deadlines, I still have to clean my home, and balance a social life but all those things are much easier now. Okay okay but how?
Well to start, I began being more open with how I felt. I realized that even though I was stressed all the time I mostly kept these feelings to myself. No one else was aware just how worn down I had become. Slowly I have been more honest with how I feel and I realized that I am far from alone. A lot of my friends could relate and some were even in the exact same boat as me. We now are open about not wanting to hang out if one of us needs a rest day, allowing us to feel less guilty and less stressed.
Secondly, I began prioritizing. What NEEDS to get done today? Not what are all the things I CAN get done, because I was getting lots of things done but I realized many of the things I was trying to squeeze in my day were taking time away from what really needed to be done. Trying to squeeze to many things led to the important items being either forgotten about or poorly done. As long as I knocked out the really important thing of my day I found myself becoming more at ease that it was no longer an anvil hanging over my head.
Lastly I began prioritizing me. This doesn’t mean I was all of the sudden selfish and only did things that benefitted me. Instead I realized, how can I take care of others when I can barely take care of myself. When I’m cranky all the time I’m not exactly a joy to be around. Plus who wants to be in a bad mood all the time, I know I don’t. If I need to take 5-10 minutes in the bathroom to breath then I do. If something needs to be put off another day in order to do it right then I do.
It’s certainly not easy, especially when we often have problems that need solutions sooner rather than later but if your not okay than none of those problems will get solved anyways and instead just create more. Learning when to say no, learning when to take a break, and learning how prioritize and plan can help break down the big problems into smaller more manageable ones.
While it’s still a learning journey for me when it comes to taking things slow, slowly but surely I can feel my life improving and I hope that by sharing my journey you can start to feel empowered to make a difference in your own life to. Whether you’ve been fighting this battle or are just feeling free, I hope to encourage you guys to take the steps you need to better your lives! If you enjoyed today’s post be sure to leave a like and even subscribe, and feel free to comment your thoughts on today’s topic!
With Love, Victoria Fox
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